Thanks to everyone brave enough to enter my sensuous writing contest, which ended a week ago tonight. It takes courage to post a piece of writing and to have it examined by all who read it. I appreciate the work of every single one of you, and found delightful writing in each.

I was swept away by evocative images from all over the world, including: the pudding-like consistency of ricotta, a spoon that smelled like the cedars of Lebanon, plump twists of pasta, rhythmic plunges and dips of a paddle, pebble-sized pieces of pork fat, almond meal as fine as sand, a pillow of hot dough burning through paper, the first burst of peach juice, a jade fringe of lettuce, chai in a fragile clay cup, soup the color of Georgia O’Keefe’s desert…I could go on and on, but why not read the samples yourself and find your own favorites?

To select the winner, I printed out the writing samples and highlighted adjectives, words or phrases that struck me as sensuous. Then I counted up how many terms I highlighted in each sample, and determined the sample with the most color marks. 

The winner was the piece by Garrett McCord of Vanilla Garlic. Here it is, with my highlighted words and phrases:

I think something was wrong with me as a child. I detested most breakfast cereal, the sugary kind advertised on Saturday mornings right after a cliffhanging episodes of Power Rangers or Ninja Turtles. I found the taste too cloyingly sweet and the epileptic colors unappealing (though I did have a secret love of Captain Crunch, my one exception). Whereas I happily ate Raisin Bran with bananas my brother adored Corn Pops. It wasn’t for their taste but their value as a play thing which was the way he evaluated the potential enjoyment of any food. Corn Pops were one of his favorites; their saccharine sheen made them stick to his skin with ease, so in the morning the family would be entertained by the terror of the pop-marked space creature, and less so when he shot them out of his nose onto the table with enough force that they would explode in a yellow puff, the airy crack echoing in the tile kitchen.

I put the sensuous writing parts I liked in color so you could see them. Notice his use of writing technique such as

• innovative, even downright strange, adjectives (epileptic, saccarine)
• power verbs (shot, explode, crack echoing)
• use of metaphor (calling his brother a space creature)
• word play (pop-marked instead of pock-marked)
• sense of humor (I don’t need to explain that, do I?).

Garrett wins an hour of my consulting time. Congratulations!

And again, my gratitude to everyone who entered. Readers, if there is a phrase or word in the samples that delighted you, please write in.

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Brooke Burton of Foodwoolf puts her food writing chops to use.

Yesterday at breakfast here at Club Med Ixtapa Food Blogger Camp, I cast around for the perfect food on which to base a food writing exercise using all the senses.

(You remember which senses I mean, right? Let’s review:

• Touch
• Taste
• Sound
• Sight
• Smell.)

Then I saw individual boxes of Kellogg’s Corn Pops at the cereal station. Perfect! They would trigger childhood memories, make us laugh, or inspire rants about their sticky sugariness. I could use them to discuss food writing techniques like metaphor and simile, and powerful action verbs.

To warm up the crowd, I quoted from an email I got from Ann Haigh about analogies and metaphors found in high school essays:

• She grew on him like she was a colony of E. Coli, and he was room-temperature Canadian beef.
• She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.
• The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.

And then the participants set to work.

Matt Amendariz of MattBites takes a break from his usual travel writing.

Garrett McCord of Vanilla Garlic was first to read. That takes courage in a group of peers.

Jaden Hair declared that the cereal made excellent fangs. Would you guess that she's a mom?

The results delighted me. That’s what always happens. Those who read their work wrote sensuously, with humor, emotion and evocative scenes from childhood and family life. (See examples in the comments on my earlier post on sensuous writing.)

What’s the secret to unleashing your creativity during writing exercises?  My short video about writing exercises explains.

Try it for yourself (not necessarily with Corn Pops), and enter Will Write for Food’s 150-word sensuous writing contest. Deadline is Saturday at midnight.

And for a student’s eye-view of this class, see this post by Dianasaur Dishes.

(Thanks to Owen Rubin the photos of Brooke, Matt and Garrett; to Matt Armendariz for the photo of Jaden: and to Diane Eblin for the video.)

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In the wee hours on Saturday, I’m taking off for the first Food Blogger Camp at Club Med Ixtapa Pacific, Mexico. I’ll be teaching a class on Writing with the Senses, and looking for a few good laughs if people write over-the-top pornographic examples.

There might also be magical prose like this:

  “The crust is as crunchy as a butter cookie, so brittle that it cracks audibly when you press it with your fork; grains of cinnamon sugar bounce off the surface as it shatters. The bottom crust is softer than the top, but browned and still breakable. Where the top and bottom meet, there’s a knotty cord of dough that becomes impregnated with enough fruit filling to make it chewy. Inside is a dense apple pack of firm Ida Red crescents bound in syrupy juice.”

– Jane and Michael Stern, The Ultimate Apple Pie, Gourmet

Why is this paragraph good? Notice how the Sterns describe in slow motion as they evoke the senses. You watch that fork and hear it shatter the surface of the pie. You imagine the chewy crust and the syrupy apples. Now appreciate the powerful action verbs: cracks, bounce, shatters, impregnated.  And admire their use of analogy (crunchy as a butter cookie) and metaphor (a knotty cord).

Since I’ll be in Mexico for a week where Internet service is limited, I’m announcing my first writing contest. While I’m gone, I invite you to experiment with these techniques and submit your writing below in a comment. Give me 150 words maximum of sensuous writing. More will disqualify you. 

Deadline is January 16, when I return. The following week I’ll announce the winner, who receives a free hour of my consulting time, to discuss

• blogging or writing samples
• writing career
• questions about recipe writing or freelance writing
• book ideas, etc.

Be funny, be creative, but most of all, get readers to see it, smell it, hear it, touch it and taste it in their minds. Good luck!

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